Big Heart: Finding Joy in Others’ Success”

“By celebrating other people’s success as if it’s your own, you grow stronger.” – Unknown

This quote holds profound wisdom. If we truly understand its depth, we can significantly reduce human suffering and create conditions of lasting happiness in our lives. But before we delve into its meaning, we must first examine the root cause of human suffering.

The Root of Human Suffering

One of the primary reasons for human misery is ego-driven thinking—the constant belief that life is a competition. Many people assume that if they are to win, someone else must lose. Conversely, if another person wins, it is perceived as their own failure.

From childhood, we are conditioned to think in terms of competition. Schools instill in us the idea that we must come first; otherwise, we are defeated. This mindset implants the poison of rivalry in our minds from an early age.

Consider this: You score 85% on an exam and feel happy, but the moment you hear that someone else scored 90%, your happiness fades. Your score has not changed, yet the success of another person diminishes your joy. Instead of taking pride in your achievement, you feel sorrowful because someone else performed better.

This is the blind race of competition. Initially, it disrupts your peace of mind. Then, it robs you of your sleep, and eventually, it dictates your self-worth. Your happiness no longer depends on self-improvement but on outperforming others.

Over time, this mentality extends beyond academics. If your neighbor builds a bigger house, your contentment in your own home disappears. Your house hasn’t changed, but your perception has. Your ego is wounded, and you resolve to build a bigger house. This cycle continues endlessly, making true happiness unattainable.

If we look at history, we see this same pattern on a grand scale. Napoleon Bonaparte didn’t wage wars because he needed more land; he did so because Britain had more colonies. His conquests weren’t about necessity but about surpassing others.

Similarly, people today take loans to buy expensive items, not out of necessity, but because their friends or relatives have them. Many extravagant weddings aren’t about celebrating love but about outdoing others, even if it means financial ruin.

The Wisdom of Epicurus

The first step in overcoming jealousy and blind imitation lies in a shift in perspective. The philosopher Epicurus wisely said:”Do not envy those who seem to be doing well. Their happiness does not diminish yours. Rejoice with them and continue your own journey.”

Expanding the Heart

Taittiriya Upanishad: “He who rejoices in the joy of others and finds his own happiness in their happiness attains true bliss.”

Judaism (Pirkei Avot 4:1): “Who is rich? He who rejoices in the portion of others.”

Jainism (Tattvartha Sutra 7.11): “Compassion and joy in others’ virtues are the true path to liberation.”

Seneca: “He grew stronger because he saw his friend succeed.”

We need a shift in education—one that fosters a positive, humanitarian mindset. Instead of “win-lose” thinking, we must adopt a “win-win” approach. Stephen R. Covey, in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, emphasizes the importance of a win-win mentality. But I propose going even further—opening our hearts wider.

Be happy in your success, but be even happier in the success of others. This may sound unusual, but consider this: What if we celebrated others’ achievements as if they were our own? After all, we are all human, interconnected by shared experiences.

When Marie Curie discovered radium, scientists worldwide had two choices:

1. To feel envious—a sign of small-mindedness.

2. To celebrate her achievement, recognizing that her discovery was a victory for all of humanity.

Most chose the second path. They rejoiced in her success and felt inspired to make contributions of their own.

If we can make our hearts so big that we consider someone else’s success as our own victory, find joy in it, and draw inspiration from it, then I say most of the problems in our lives will disappear. Because in that state, whether we win or someone else does, we will always have sweetness in our both hands.

one last thing I want to leave you with—universe opens its doors to those who can truly rejoice in the happiness of others. If you can fill your heart with such immense love, then I am certain that every door to success in this world will open for you. Because I cannot believe that God or universe would ever want to keep such a big-hearted person unhappy.

Final Thought

Forget competition; embrace cooperation. Forget ‘I’; embrace ‘we.’ Love others as you love yourself, and wish for them the same success you wish for yourself.